I think the headline says it all… me & Kylie have our very own comic strip penned, drawn & ALSO starring the legendary French Cartoonist Wilfried Cartoon.
Details as to why & where you can see it are currently Top secret but watch this space for more details… or maybe watch the streets? *hint hint* Meanwhile here is an EXCLUSIVE preview of the early stages in it’s development.
As most of you know, me & Kylie do a ‘little’ bit of art every now & again, so imagine my surprize when one of our favorite artists, the legendary Wilfried Cartoon sent us an email all the way from Sunny France with his latest drawing …featuring the 3 of us!!
Nice one, Wilfried… it’s EPIC, fingers crossed you maybe seeing more of them *nudge, nudge*
Tonight Raylene turned up for her radio show with Kylie with seconds to spare due to the fact that she was on set, anyway just incase she was late or couldn’t make it i was on hand to fill in, so in true “Let’s try anything” style i had to write my own bio as an introduction to the show.
As you may or may not know i therefore wasn’t on the show to co-host so i decided to show you guys my intro, mainly because i think it’s amuzing but mainly because i have my own website & can put any old bollocks on here that i want.
Ah Thankyou.
“Andy Appleton is a big tits enthusiast from the North of England. He is a former nightclub impresario turned graffiti artist turned pornographic art director. His interests include staring at sun, convincing the world caffeine doesn’t exist, Bacon sandwiches & Shark wrestling. Andy’s turns on include big tits, tits that are big & tits that defy the basic laws of science. His turn offs include women with large faces, women with long lumpy toes & Raisins. Andy is probably most well-known for marrying that girl with the blonde hair & big tits from Babewatch.”
Hello all,
As most of you are aware me & Kylie get our fair share of crazy people who tweet us, however over the last week or so we have been subjected to a special brand of crazy in the form of @GrahamDamn33. Anyway, long story short, he tweets me or Kylie (& various other pornstars) random insults then argues with anyone who tweets him, then he blocks everyone…. then he deletes his tweets. But today i decided to copy & paste them as we chatted (about the world as he sees it) & then blog our entire conversation!
I make no apologies for @GrahamDamn33’s spelling or grammar, i personally think it adds to his crazy.
Enjoy.
G: @theandyappleton You are just a jerk. Tried to friend you and Kylie, yet you lie about everything. You both are just not as important at all
Me: Everyone, please please please read @grahamdamn33 ‘s timeline before he deletes it… it’s AWESOME 🙂
G: @theandyappleton you are a colossal liar Andy. Get a life and quit riding the coatails of your idiot other. All I asked was a friend.
Me: @grahamdamn33 YAY 🙂
G: @theandyappleton Your significant other does other guys because you can’t please her. So dont blame me for your shortcomings.
Me: @grahamdamn33 OK
G: @theandyappleton Your only claim to fame is that you sleep witha girl that 5,000 guys before you have. Not impressed. You are nothing.
Me: @grahamdamn33 this is true i know, but thanks for pointing it out i keep forgetting 🙂
G: @theandyappleton The only one who hasnt screwed Kylie is my Grandpa, and he is dead. You have a prize their dude. Sloppy 10,000,000 seconds?
Me: @grahamdamn33 awesome, do i get a trophy?
G: @theandyappleton You love a slut golden. Your business. Will throw you a rope when you fall into that sloppy canyon. Yuck.
Me: @grahamdamn33 i appreciate that thank you, & i will of course reimburse you for the cost of the rope should that happen.
G: @theandyappleton Goodbye oldtimers. You just dont matter anymore. Kylie was cool 25 years ago. Not now. Collect Social Security dude.
Me: @grahamdamn33 Do you have to go so soon? I was enjoying our chat. Sorry about Kylie being uncool btw, still at least we have the memories.
G: @theandyappleton She is fat and flabby. Reminds me of my great grandmother. Not attractive. Makes me want to puke. Why is she still online?
Me: @grahamdamn33 i have no idea, but you are right, i’ve constantly told her about all the cakes she eats but she won’t listen… what do i do?
G: @theandyappleton Memories are like a bowel movement. Just a thing of the past. Like Kylie, no one really cares anymore.
Me: @grahamdamn33 that’s pretty deep, i love that about you, you always cut straight to the point, you are like the Dalai Lama of crazy people.
G: @theandyappleton She was great 30 years ago Think she needs a mirror to tell her time to go. Looks like a milk cow now.
Me: @grahamdamn33 funny u should said say that, cause i was milking her earlier. We can produce 4 or 5 gallons on a good day. We save a fortune.
G: @theandyappleton Glad you are there, because I wouldn’t bang her with your dick. Just gross right now. Time to go away. No one wants it.
Me: @grahamdamn33 damn straight you wouldn’t bang her with my dick, i have no idea where it is. I swapped it for some magic beans in 1943.
G: @theandyappleton you are just gross. Go milk that ugly cow. Right up your nothing alley. Neither one of you matter at all.
Me: @grahamdamn33 i AM pretty gross, again thanks 4 reminding me. I can’t milk her up Nothing alley though, the council sent me a cease & desist
—End scene—
At this point GrahamDamn33 then deleted everything, blocked me & disapeared. Ah Thankyou.
You might remember a few months back me & Kylie Tweeting about the art direction we did for The Dark Knight XXX, well now you can see ALL the hard work we put into it for yourselves cause the is DVD out now (click the box cover to get a copy)
I am going to automatically assume that you have all now all just ordered the movie, so while you patiently wait for the postman to turn up with your rampant superhero filth, sit back & enjoy a couple of BTS pics that we took on set… and trust me, this is one of the best movies you will see all year.
UPDATE: Catch a preview of our BTS Interview here: http://youtu.be/_3ICRlWCoUQ
ANOTHER exclusive for our BRAND NEW art show this Saturday at Maximillian Gallery… the first official flyer is NOW on the streets!
Any arguments? …Nuff said!
Sat at home the other night i got a first hand glimpse of Deekay (aka Kylie, aka my wife) as she started work on her latest and BIGGEST project ….from start to finish! As she worked away, i took pictures at various stages of her spraying & then hand painting it over the a course of about 8 hours.
It’s an AMAZING piece & it just goes to show just how far she has grown as a street artist, the final touches of ‘canis graffiticus’ were inspired… so, sit back & enjoy the slideshow.
Hey Everyone,
Just so you know, the trailer for the latest (& probably one of the greatest) Axel Braun movies “The Dark Knight XXX” is now up & running. This film was a labour of love for all involved & features some of the coolest sets we have ever built, some of the best costumes we’ve ever seen & definitely one of the best cast lists in porn.
I am REALLY lookin forward to this movie the trailer will blow your mind, so check it out by clicking on the pic.
PS: I chose this pic btw, cause it gives you an idea of the production value that went into the sets… oh, and & cause it features my art!
What can i say about today?
Well, it’s the day i am most grateful for, the day i realise how fortunate i am, the day that many years ago started you down the path that would eventually become my fate… but mainly it’s the day where i am thankful that you are my wife & the day when i am most amazed at just how i lucky i am.
So before i go any further, i just wanna say that I LOVE YOU, thankyou for being in my life.
You are more beautiful than you have ever been, you are more loved than you can ever imagine & you are more cherished than you could possibly believe. You are my soulmate, my best friend & my source of inspiration, i am the very definition of a lucky man, in fact i am the luckiest man in the world.
So here’s to you on your special day, always know that i will be by your side for many more to come.
Your loving & grateful husband. x x x
The Andy Appleton 